The EN of ME

Friday, February 2, 2007

I'm so missing a lot of things lately....
Other den, da laughters of ma gerlfrenz, da fun dat we hav wif ma pri skool peepz (i'm so missing u eis... hAhAhaa!!), iTE cliques-all of dem, i mean all, frm Stardom, imah, da dance ppl, da performances dat i missed doing & got to noe peepz frm dere too... and all dose ppl which i had came across... not forgetting Palin acquantaince..
ALL....

If i noe ma life is gona b diz way....

Well...
if only i can turn back time, b more stubborn, run away frm home, b wat i wana b, rather den such an idiotic filial daughter which i so feel not being appreciated at all.....
At least if i dun hav an education, i shud have achieved wat i wanted now.....
Be wat i wana b.... B sumbody... being appreciated, at least by others....

I duno y,
i think i been missing and missed a lots of things in life...
And it's already 1st Feb...
i think i shud start keeping records of wat i had achieve or done per monthly thingy...

Missing sumone..??
Practically,dat sumone uh... who siah..?
well, to think again, if dey dun, y muz i ryt...
(SHIT.. i hate it if diz happens, me and ma self-denial, DEGiLZz)

well, as dose who noes me (really noes me)..
i dun really call ppl...
dat is like one of ma phobia...
it's a long story.... to make it short... i dun really call ppl since i'm small and i usually hav diz fear dat, da ppl i call mite b bz, or mite think i'm b irritate dem, or mite think dat "well she will usually calls when she nid our help" dat kinda thing... to summarize it i scared being rejected or feel as if i was... Yeah i admit i scared being rejected... Coz i think i hav ma self-pride here to taken care of.. (well ma alter ego la) watever...
& if i "manage" to call dat sumone (well juz take dat as a stranger, well he/dey is/are stranger/s ryt..? to think dat i dun really noe dem..) I feel like i really did it, putting aside ma ego, ma fear all aside, and juz face wat shall happen...
but sume juz duno....
So here, i missed dose ppl calling me.. dose "Strangers"...

*sigh...

- eyEzZy Nu ~ 7:23 AM.